Note: How has your confidence lever been lately? Or more importantly, where has your confidence been placed in? Here is a short but encouraging article on how we need to have confidence, but not “self-Confidence” alone, but a “God-Confidence.” After all, aren’t we told with God, “all things are possible” (Luke 1:37)? Since this is true of God and not of anyone else, it only seems logical that we place our complete confidence in God in order to possess a proper view of self. Trust in God more and less on self and see how far that takes you! I guarantee it will take you farther in life than you are now! Enjoy!
Developing “God Confidence”
Steve Diggs
Allow me to postulate a premise that I speak on in the Retooled and Refueled Seminar. However, it does not sit well with our politically correct, self-actualized, and overly indulgent culture.
That premise is this: It’s possible we have made a drastic mistake to tell two generations of American children that their goal should be to have a high level of self-confidence. I’ve watched over recent decades as we have gradually stopped tapping little ones on the tush and saying, “That was a bad thing to do, Freddy!” Today, young parents agonize over whether it’s even wise to send their little monster to the corner for a time-out, worried that it might damage his self-esteem if they tell him that biting a buddy on the finger is not acceptable.
The Bible is replete with warnings about pride and arrogance—sometimes what we refer to as self-confidence. Parents are urged in Scripture to step up to the plate and do their job: “Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death” (Proverbs 19:18, emphasis mine, niv). I like this particular passage because it speaks of both causal behavior and resulting outcomes. The writer reminds parents of their God-given mandate to discipline early while “there is hope.” Why? So, as a parent, you won’t bear responsibility for the inevitable ruin that comes to children who grow up without loving discipline. Life (and especially childhood) is too short to fail at this most important of callings.
Anytime people in leadership attempt to build self-confidence by rewarding those who fail to perform at exceptional levels with the same trophies and grades that are received by the few who truly earn them, we are sending a damaging message to both groups. We are saying that your self-esteem is more important than your actual deeds.
Anyone who works in or visits our prisons sees the results of undisciplined living every time they go behind the walls. I’m convinced that many of today’s worst criminals have no shortage of self-confidence. What they lack is morality and respect for others! This is what happens when a culture tells everyone he is his own “god.” If we each self-confidently assert our own “godhood” who is to determine what is right and what is wrong?
How can you claim that your belief system trumps mine? And, more importantly, how do we avoid chaos and anarchy?
So what’s the answer? Could it have to do less with the “confidence” side of the equation, and more to do with the “self ” side? I agree we should aggressively teach confidence, boldness, and optimism to every generation.
But maybe, instead of telling ourselves that confidence has its genesis in one’s self, we should accept that our confidence is in (and from) God. When we begin to reframe the issue in this way, good things happen. First, the pressure is off. At our core (and in our more truthful moments) we each realize how finite and imperfect we are. To believe that self-confidence is the ultimate goal forces any thinking person to realize how precarious he is in an uncertain world. But when we recognize that there is someone greater in whom we can build our confidence, we have found the gold standard. Now we can relax and rest in the assured confidence that we can safely lean into any headwind.
I call this “God Confidence.” It makes life easier. No longer am I forced to pump myself up with some trite psychobabble that I know begins and ends with my own limited abilities. God Confidence allows human dignity to return. I no longer have to compete or compare myself to others to find self-worth.
Suddenly I’m at eye level with all of God’s people. I am no more, or less, worthy than they are. My value is founded and grounded in God—not myself. I don’t have to look up to anyone. And I mustn’t dare look down on anyone either.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
The One-Step Plan for Taming Temptations
Note: Who doesn't experience “temptations?” It is important to understand that the sin is not the temptation, but when we yield to it. Temptations can come at anytime, even while in church! Temptations are also neutral – there are good and bad ones. For example, I may be tempted to buy and give to someone who is homeless. This is good, if I follow through and do so. If I am tempted to buy food for someone whom God places on my heart to bless, but I don’t follow through and do so, then that would be sin as well (cf. James 4:17). But the kind of temptation that the article below is speaking about are the ones which comes to us to move us to sin. How do we battle against such temptations? What is a good plan? You may be surprised to know that there is only one step needed to get you off to a good start. Check it out!
The One-Step Plan for Taming Temptations
According to the dictionary, the word “tame” means to "make less powerful and easier to control." As Christians, we need to learn to tame temptations, don't you agree?
Through the years, I've discovered a very important principle for taming temptations. I can tell you that if you will follow the one step I'm going to share below, you'll enjoy much greater success in taming temptations. But you must commit ahead of time to never swerve from this one step. You must make a covenant with yourself to be relentlessly faithful to this one step. Only then will you enjoy the victory I speak of.
The one step you must unswervingly commit to is to irrevocably SAY NO to the temptation at the very moment it first emerges in the mind. There can be no compromise here. As soon as the temptation first surfaces in the mind, you must choose against it INSTANTLY, with no delay, and no hesitation.
Here is the reasoning: At the moment the temptation first emerges in the mind, it is at its weakest. During the first three seconds of the temptation, the strength of the temptation might be likened to a spiderweb that is around you. You are strong enough to break free from a spiderweb.
However, if you've not said no to the temptation and you reach five seconds, that spiderweb becomes dental floss. It becomes harder to break free.
If you're still pondering the temptation at seven seconds, it becomes a rope -- very hard to break free at this point.
If you're still pondering the temptation at nine seconds, it becomes a wire around you -- it's almost a sure thing you won't break free.
If you're still pondering the temptation at 11 seconds, it becomes barbed wire -- you're trapped. You can't break free and you will inevitably sin.
The underlying theology behind this analogy is that man's mind is fallen. It's been infected by sin. Our brains have "buggy software," as it were. Because of indwelling sin, our minds have a bent toward sin. Our fallen brains "default" toward sinful behavior.
Sin has what you might call a gravitational pull. At the first moment a temptation emerges in the mind, THAT is the moment at which it will be easiest to pull free from the gravitational pull of sin. The longer you wait, though, the stronger the gravitational pull becomes. That is why you must choose to SAY NO to temptation the very moment it emerges. That first moment is the time when you have the best chance of victory over the temptation.
When a temptation first surfaces in the mind, many Christians often make the mistake of pondering to themselves: "Should I or shouldn't I?" They wrestle over whether they should give in to the temptation. The problem is, because the mind is fallen and has a bent toward sin, the human mind is preconditioned to succumb to temptation. That's the way your sin-ridden brain is "wired." The longer you give your brain to reflect on the tempting thought, the more rationalizations it comes up with why you should give in to the temptation. THAT is why you must choose to SAY NO to temptation the very moment it first emerges.
Now we begin to see why Scripture consistently urges us to immediately flee from sin:
Second Timothy 2:22 urges us to "flee youthful passions."
First Timothy 6:11 urges us: "As for you, O man of God, flee these things."
First Corinthians 10:14 tells us to "flee from idolatry."
First Corinthians 6:18 tells us to "flee from sexual immorality."
The Greek word for "flee" carries the idea of "taking flight" -- much like a bird that flies off as soon as it becomes aware of an approaching cat. The bird doesn't just sit there, pondering "Should I or shouldn't I?" It takes offimmediately. The word "flee" carries the idea of "quickly escaping danger." As soon as the danger surfaces, one must take immediate steps to get out of danger.
Related to this, Genesis 4:7 tells us that "sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is for you..." In this metaphor, sin is like a predatory animal outside your door, waiting for you to step out so it can pounce on you. That is why one must be ready to "take flight" by fleeing sin. An immediate response is necessary.
One of our best examples of this in the Old Testament relates to Joseph, toward whom Potiphar's lustful wife made sexual advances. Joseph immediately "fled and got out of the house" (Genesis 39:12).
This idea of fleeing from sin lies behind the teaching of Job 31:1: "I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin?" Job had a predetermined attitude of turning away his gaze so that lust could not pounce on him like a predatory animal. He conditioned his spiritual reflexes to turn from sinful thoughts immediately.
An immediate response is the only policy that can keep you safe. Proverbs 6:27-28 puts it this way: "Can a man carry fire next to his chest and his clothes not be burned? Or can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched?" One must respond immediately. If you feel the heat of temptation, you must move away quickly, or else you'll get burned by sin. This immediate action is the "one step" that will help tame temptation in your life.
This is also why 1 Peter 2:11 instructs us, "abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul." The word "abstain" is a present tense in the Greek, indicating continuous action. The only way you can continually and perpetually abstain from the passions of the flesh is to immediately turn from temptations as soon as they surface.
So, I exhort you, my brothers and sisters, choose today to be a slave of Jesus Christ -- and always SAY NO to sin as soon as the temptation arises in the mind.
The One-Step Plan for Taming Temptations
According to the dictionary, the word “tame” means to "make less powerful and easier to control." As Christians, we need to learn to tame temptations, don't you agree?
Through the years, I've discovered a very important principle for taming temptations. I can tell you that if you will follow the one step I'm going to share below, you'll enjoy much greater success in taming temptations. But you must commit ahead of time to never swerve from this one step. You must make a covenant with yourself to be relentlessly faithful to this one step. Only then will you enjoy the victory I speak of.
The one step you must unswervingly commit to is to irrevocably SAY NO to the temptation at the very moment it first emerges in the mind. There can be no compromise here. As soon as the temptation first surfaces in the mind, you must choose against it INSTANTLY, with no delay, and no hesitation.
Here is the reasoning: At the moment the temptation first emerges in the mind, it is at its weakest. During the first three seconds of the temptation, the strength of the temptation might be likened to a spiderweb that is around you. You are strong enough to break free from a spiderweb.
However, if you've not said no to the temptation and you reach five seconds, that spiderweb becomes dental floss. It becomes harder to break free.
If you're still pondering the temptation at seven seconds, it becomes a rope -- very hard to break free at this point.
If you're still pondering the temptation at nine seconds, it becomes a wire around you -- it's almost a sure thing you won't break free.
If you're still pondering the temptation at 11 seconds, it becomes barbed wire -- you're trapped. You can't break free and you will inevitably sin.
The underlying theology behind this analogy is that man's mind is fallen. It's been infected by sin. Our brains have "buggy software," as it were. Because of indwelling sin, our minds have a bent toward sin. Our fallen brains "default" toward sinful behavior.
Sin has what you might call a gravitational pull. At the first moment a temptation emerges in the mind, THAT is the moment at which it will be easiest to pull free from the gravitational pull of sin. The longer you wait, though, the stronger the gravitational pull becomes. That is why you must choose to SAY NO to temptation the very moment it emerges. That first moment is the time when you have the best chance of victory over the temptation.
When a temptation first surfaces in the mind, many Christians often make the mistake of pondering to themselves: "Should I or shouldn't I?" They wrestle over whether they should give in to the temptation. The problem is, because the mind is fallen and has a bent toward sin, the human mind is preconditioned to succumb to temptation. That's the way your sin-ridden brain is "wired." The longer you give your brain to reflect on the tempting thought, the more rationalizations it comes up with why you should give in to the temptation. THAT is why you must choose to SAY NO to temptation the very moment it first emerges.
Now we begin to see why Scripture consistently urges us to immediately flee from sin:
Second Timothy 2:22 urges us to "flee youthful passions."
First Timothy 6:11 urges us: "As for you, O man of God, flee these things."
First Corinthians 10:14 tells us to "flee from idolatry."
First Corinthians 6:18 tells us to "flee from sexual immorality."
The Greek word for "flee" carries the idea of "taking flight" -- much like a bird that flies off as soon as it becomes aware of an approaching cat. The bird doesn't just sit there, pondering "Should I or shouldn't I?" It takes offimmediately. The word "flee" carries the idea of "quickly escaping danger." As soon as the danger surfaces, one must take immediate steps to get out of danger.
Related to this, Genesis 4:7 tells us that "sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is for you..." In this metaphor, sin is like a predatory animal outside your door, waiting for you to step out so it can pounce on you. That is why one must be ready to "take flight" by fleeing sin. An immediate response is necessary.
One of our best examples of this in the Old Testament relates to Joseph, toward whom Potiphar's lustful wife made sexual advances. Joseph immediately "fled and got out of the house" (Genesis 39:12).
This idea of fleeing from sin lies behind the teaching of Job 31:1: "I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin?" Job had a predetermined attitude of turning away his gaze so that lust could not pounce on him like a predatory animal. He conditioned his spiritual reflexes to turn from sinful thoughts immediately.
An immediate response is the only policy that can keep you safe. Proverbs 6:27-28 puts it this way: "Can a man carry fire next to his chest and his clothes not be burned? Or can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched?" One must respond immediately. If you feel the heat of temptation, you must move away quickly, or else you'll get burned by sin. This immediate action is the "one step" that will help tame temptation in your life.
This is also why 1 Peter 2:11 instructs us, "abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul." The word "abstain" is a present tense in the Greek, indicating continuous action. The only way you can continually and perpetually abstain from the passions of the flesh is to immediately turn from temptations as soon as they surface.
So, I exhort you, my brothers and sisters, choose today to be a slave of Jesus Christ -- and always SAY NO to sin as soon as the temptation arises in the mind.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Overcoming the Fear Factor
Note: To some degree, some more than others, we all tackle the challenge of fear in our lives. At times the fear is legit, but most of the time it is not. Fear robs God’s people of true joy and sets us up to listen to and follow Satan’s lies. Do you want to face your fears and get a better handle on them with the help of the Lord? Then prayerfully read this article and make the necessary applications to your life. Enjoy!
Overcoming the Fear Factor
By Micca Campbell
Worry, fear, and anxiety were never meant to be a part of our vocabulary, and yet most of us worry more than we’d care to admit. What are you afraid of? Are you scared of waking up to an intruder in the middle of the night? Perhaps it’s flying on an airplane. Maybe it’s the fear of sending your child off to college. Perhaps your greatest fear is not being able to provide for your family. Most of us can find something that haunts us.
Panic best describes the emotion I felt when the nurse rolled Jimmy out into the living room. Both of his legs and most of his fingers had been amputated. Jimmy was the father of my son’s friend. Beset with diabetes, he was at the end of his life, but refused to let go. Concerned about whether Jimmy knew the Lord or not, I had phoned his wife, Juanita, and asked if I could visit him. I wanted to be sure that Jimmy would meet his Creator as Savior and not as Judge.
Jimmy’s deteriorating condition took me by surprise. When I saw him I was terrified. I whispered to the Lord under my breath, "Oh, God, how can I minister to this man when I don't know what he's been through?" Even though I was scared stiff, somehow I knew God would show up to do what I couldn’t do. That’s exactly what He did because God has given us this promise. ““I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Phil 4:13).
As Jimmy and I talked, it was apparent that he knew the Father, but I sensed there was more. We weren’t far into our conversation when I discovered the real trouble with Jimmy — he was afraid to die.
I told Jimmy Bible stories about God sending angels to people in need, people just like him. Those angels had a special message: “Fear not, for God is with you!” As I shared with Jimmy, peace washed over his face as he received the message for himself.
At Jimmy's funeral his wife shared Jimmy’s last moments with me. Jimmy would often wake from his sleep wide-eyed and call out, "I'm afraid!" Juanita would pat him gently and remind him of God's promise: "Don't be afraid, Jimmy. God is with you." Then he would sleep again. The last time Jimmy opened his eyes, he just stared at the ceiling. His wife asked, "Jimmy, are you afraid?" Jimmy whispered, "No, I'm not afraid. I'm just looking at the angels." With that, Jimmy stepped from this world into the next.
I find it interesting that while Jimmy’s outcome didn’t change, the way he experienced death changed because he trusted in the promise of God. I experienced this same truth in my life. Even though I pleaded with God to save my first husband from death, it wasn’t God’s plan. Yet I chose to trust God’s purpose. In spite of my fear, I chose to believe what I couldn’t understand. Doing so changed the way I journeyed through life and the valley of death. I had a companion named Jesus.
Jimmy’s story reminds me that when I’m afraid, I need not fret because the same promise God made to Jimmy, He makes to you and me: “Fear not, child, for I am with you.” In fact, did you know that the phrase “fear not” is stated in the Bible 366 times? That’s one “fear not” for every day of the year, with one extra left over for those really hard days. Why does God faithfully remind us over and over to “fear not”? He does so because we are not created to live in fear. Second Timothy 1:7 tells us, “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.” You and I were created to live by faith, and in God, we have all the power we need for a faith that is stronger than all our fears.
It’s a Problem of Faith
The truth is, most of what we worry about never comes to pass, but we insist on tormenting ourselves anyway. Worrying about what may or may not happen can nearly drive us crazy. A lot can go wrong in life, but God doesn’t want us to become worrywarts.
It takes faith to battle fear and learn to live with assurance in a God we can bank on. Unfortunately, most people go through life missing opportunities because they’re afraid to really live the way God intended. Fear becomes a stumbling block that leaves us with regrets. Relying on our faith allows us to live fearlessly.
False Advertisement
My youngest son loves chocolate milk. One day as I stirred syrup into a tall glass of milk, I noticed that the label on the bottle read “Genuine Artificial Flavor.” I was shocked! What appeared to be look and taste real was actually artificial! I felt cheated and deceived. This was false advertisement.
In the same way, the father of lies specializes in false advertisement. He’s good at making our fears look real when they are not. In fact, Satan’s greatest tool for causing us to doubt God’s protection is the fear that God will not follow through with His promises. The Enemy works hard to convince us that God is too busy to do anything about our concerns. If anything is going to be done about our situation, we’ll have to do it ourselves. Like the boogeyman, Satan’s spooks are all smoke and mirrors. We can easily expose his trickery by determining if there is really something to fear or if our concerns are simply…
False
Evidence
Appearing
Real
This acrostic for fear is the kind of shock wave Satan uses to stun us. While the sting of fright feels real, in truth it’s merely the trickery of Satan that gets our heart pounding. It’s important for you and me to determine if our fears are real or simply Satan’s hocus-pocus. If it’s a real concern, I heed its warning. On the other hand, if my worry is false evidence that just appears real, then I know the Enemy is involved.
You may be skeptical right now, but when you realize you were created for faith, not fear, things will begin to change for you. You’ll learn how to rely on God’s care while giving Him your cares, you’ll be able to identify His goodness and mercy in your life, and you’ll overcome your fears of loneliness and insecurity. Before you know it, you’ll be able to say along with Paul, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
Overcoming the Fear Factor
By Micca Campbell
Worry, fear, and anxiety were never meant to be a part of our vocabulary, and yet most of us worry more than we’d care to admit. What are you afraid of? Are you scared of waking up to an intruder in the middle of the night? Perhaps it’s flying on an airplane. Maybe it’s the fear of sending your child off to college. Perhaps your greatest fear is not being able to provide for your family. Most of us can find something that haunts us.
Panic best describes the emotion I felt when the nurse rolled Jimmy out into the living room. Both of his legs and most of his fingers had been amputated. Jimmy was the father of my son’s friend. Beset with diabetes, he was at the end of his life, but refused to let go. Concerned about whether Jimmy knew the Lord or not, I had phoned his wife, Juanita, and asked if I could visit him. I wanted to be sure that Jimmy would meet his Creator as Savior and not as Judge.
Jimmy’s deteriorating condition took me by surprise. When I saw him I was terrified. I whispered to the Lord under my breath, "Oh, God, how can I minister to this man when I don't know what he's been through?" Even though I was scared stiff, somehow I knew God would show up to do what I couldn’t do. That’s exactly what He did because God has given us this promise. ““I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Phil 4:13).
As Jimmy and I talked, it was apparent that he knew the Father, but I sensed there was more. We weren’t far into our conversation when I discovered the real trouble with Jimmy — he was afraid to die.
I told Jimmy Bible stories about God sending angels to people in need, people just like him. Those angels had a special message: “Fear not, for God is with you!” As I shared with Jimmy, peace washed over his face as he received the message for himself.
At Jimmy's funeral his wife shared Jimmy’s last moments with me. Jimmy would often wake from his sleep wide-eyed and call out, "I'm afraid!" Juanita would pat him gently and remind him of God's promise: "Don't be afraid, Jimmy. God is with you." Then he would sleep again. The last time Jimmy opened his eyes, he just stared at the ceiling. His wife asked, "Jimmy, are you afraid?" Jimmy whispered, "No, I'm not afraid. I'm just looking at the angels." With that, Jimmy stepped from this world into the next.
I find it interesting that while Jimmy’s outcome didn’t change, the way he experienced death changed because he trusted in the promise of God. I experienced this same truth in my life. Even though I pleaded with God to save my first husband from death, it wasn’t God’s plan. Yet I chose to trust God’s purpose. In spite of my fear, I chose to believe what I couldn’t understand. Doing so changed the way I journeyed through life and the valley of death. I had a companion named Jesus.
Jimmy’s story reminds me that when I’m afraid, I need not fret because the same promise God made to Jimmy, He makes to you and me: “Fear not, child, for I am with you.” In fact, did you know that the phrase “fear not” is stated in the Bible 366 times? That’s one “fear not” for every day of the year, with one extra left over for those really hard days. Why does God faithfully remind us over and over to “fear not”? He does so because we are not created to live in fear. Second Timothy 1:7 tells us, “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.” You and I were created to live by faith, and in God, we have all the power we need for a faith that is stronger than all our fears.
It’s a Problem of Faith
The truth is, most of what we worry about never comes to pass, but we insist on tormenting ourselves anyway. Worrying about what may or may not happen can nearly drive us crazy. A lot can go wrong in life, but God doesn’t want us to become worrywarts.
It takes faith to battle fear and learn to live with assurance in a God we can bank on. Unfortunately, most people go through life missing opportunities because they’re afraid to really live the way God intended. Fear becomes a stumbling block that leaves us with regrets. Relying on our faith allows us to live fearlessly.
False Advertisement
My youngest son loves chocolate milk. One day as I stirred syrup into a tall glass of milk, I noticed that the label on the bottle read “Genuine Artificial Flavor.” I was shocked! What appeared to be look and taste real was actually artificial! I felt cheated and deceived. This was false advertisement.
In the same way, the father of lies specializes in false advertisement. He’s good at making our fears look real when they are not. In fact, Satan’s greatest tool for causing us to doubt God’s protection is the fear that God will not follow through with His promises. The Enemy works hard to convince us that God is too busy to do anything about our concerns. If anything is going to be done about our situation, we’ll have to do it ourselves. Like the boogeyman, Satan’s spooks are all smoke and mirrors. We can easily expose his trickery by determining if there is really something to fear or if our concerns are simply…
False
Evidence
Appearing
Real
This acrostic for fear is the kind of shock wave Satan uses to stun us. While the sting of fright feels real, in truth it’s merely the trickery of Satan that gets our heart pounding. It’s important for you and me to determine if our fears are real or simply Satan’s hocus-pocus. If it’s a real concern, I heed its warning. On the other hand, if my worry is false evidence that just appears real, then I know the Enemy is involved.
You may be skeptical right now, but when you realize you were created for faith, not fear, things will begin to change for you. You’ll learn how to rely on God’s care while giving Him your cares, you’ll be able to identify His goodness and mercy in your life, and you’ll overcome your fears of loneliness and insecurity. Before you know it, you’ll be able to say along with Paul, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Recover from Religious Abuse
Note: No one really thinks too long and hard that Christians can be victims of religious abuse, but it happens. We are not talking about abuse only in the Catholic Church, but also in our evangelical churches too. Pastors will sometimes force their will onto their members and take advantage of them. Members trust their pastor and such trust can be abused if the man of God is not filled with the Spirit of God. If you feel that you have been subject to religious abuse to some degree, then this article will help to get you on the road to wholesome recovery.
Recover from Religious Abuse
Whitney Hopler
A church elder yells rude, condemning words at you. A pastor tries to manipulate you and makes you feel guilty if you don’t comply. A church leader you trust sexually molests you when the two of you are alone.
When you suffer religious abuse, you must deal with the pain of figuring out how to separate the abusive behavior of those who claim to follow God from God Himself. Tragically, your pain may lead you away from God, which will only increase your misery. But if you move closer to God instead, you can discover the healing that He wants to bring into your life.
Here’s how you can recover from religious abuse:
Remember that Jesus was abused by religious leaders, so He understands your pain. Jesus suffered religious abuse during His time on earth, undergoing slander and beatings from religious leaders who then murdered Him. Jesus knows exactly what you’re going through, He cares, and He wants to heal you.
Acknowledge that your life is not where you want it to be. Admit the reality that the abuse you suffered harmed you both spiritually and emotionally. Don’t deny what’s happened to you, but don’t wallow in self-pity, either. Instead, pray for the courage you need to stop trying to rely on your own efforts to get better and submit to God’s will in every area of your life.
Commit to stop living your life in pursuit of self-defeating behavior. Ask God to help you stop dwelling on how badly you were hurt in the past and instead focus on what you need to learn from what you suffered. Pray for God’s forgiveness for the ways that your anger and bitterness have injured your relationship with Him and other people. Ask God to give you the peace and strength you need to move ahead with your life. Pray for the wisdom you need to determine what specific changes you should make with how you spend your time, energy, money, and talents so you’ll be able to fulfill God’s purposes for you.
Accept that the responsibility for getting back on track is yours and no one else’s. Only you can make the decision to get back on track with God; no one else can do it for you. So take stock of where you currently are in life, ask God to give you a vision of where He would like you to be, and develop a plan with specific goals to align every part of your life with God’s plans for you.
Choose to believe what God says about Himself. The Bible reveals that God is good and can be trusted. So recognize that God didn’t cause your abuse; rather, religious leaders who misused their authority are responsible for the abuse you’ve suffered. God cares deeply about what you’ve gone through, and you can count on Him to heal you, so make a determined effort to separate God from the abuse.
Commit to repairing your relationship with God and making amends with everyone you’ve wronged along the way. Confess the sins you’ve committed that have distanced you from God, ask God’s forgiveness for them, and accept the forgiveness He gives you. Then contact each of the people you’ve hurt or offended and apologize to them for what you said and did that was wrong. Try to make amends however you can, such as by repaying a debt or restoring something that was damaged in your relationships. Ask God to help you change your behavior going forward.
Refuse to become like those who have abused you, and abandon your desire to spread malice because of your pain and anger. Stop pursuing vindication and let go of all of your resentment. After purging your soul of toxic emotions, ask the Holy Spirit to fill your soul with love, joy, peace, patience, and kindness.
Write an account of your abusive experiences as well as your subsequent behavior. Take an inventory of what happened to you and how you acted out as a result. Be honest as you record this in writing, and enjoy the freedom you’ll feel when you expose your dark past to God’s light.
Share your experience and your own wrongdoing with a trusted friend. Meet with a friend to discuss your thoughts and feelings about the abuse you’ve suffered and the unhealthy ways you’ve reacted to it. Choose a friend who will accept you just as you are while gently guiding you, encouraging you to heal, and praying for you.
Humbly ask God to change you and help you forgive your abusers. Invite God to change every part of you so you can become the person He intends you to become. Rely on God’s help to forgive the religious leaders who abused you. Remember that God has forgiven you for many sins, and He will bless you with a closer relationship with Him when you obey His command to forgive others as He has forgiven you.
Choose to believe that God still has a good purpose for your life. Trust God’s promises that He has a good purpose and a hopeful future for you. From now on, choose: love over hate, right over wrong, forgiveness over retaliation, reconciliation over alienation, faith over fear, joy over depression, and peace over turmoil.
Nurture your relationship with God, asking Him to reveal His will to you and give you the power to carry it out. Make your relationship with God your top priority, and base all of your decisions on that. Ask God to show you how you can help other people who have gone through religious abuse and act on whatever specific ways God calls you to help others who need to heal.
Recover from Religious Abuse
Whitney Hopler
A church elder yells rude, condemning words at you. A pastor tries to manipulate you and makes you feel guilty if you don’t comply. A church leader you trust sexually molests you when the two of you are alone.
When you suffer religious abuse, you must deal with the pain of figuring out how to separate the abusive behavior of those who claim to follow God from God Himself. Tragically, your pain may lead you away from God, which will only increase your misery. But if you move closer to God instead, you can discover the healing that He wants to bring into your life.
Here’s how you can recover from religious abuse:
Remember that Jesus was abused by religious leaders, so He understands your pain. Jesus suffered religious abuse during His time on earth, undergoing slander and beatings from religious leaders who then murdered Him. Jesus knows exactly what you’re going through, He cares, and He wants to heal you.
Acknowledge that your life is not where you want it to be. Admit the reality that the abuse you suffered harmed you both spiritually and emotionally. Don’t deny what’s happened to you, but don’t wallow in self-pity, either. Instead, pray for the courage you need to stop trying to rely on your own efforts to get better and submit to God’s will in every area of your life.
Commit to stop living your life in pursuit of self-defeating behavior. Ask God to help you stop dwelling on how badly you were hurt in the past and instead focus on what you need to learn from what you suffered. Pray for God’s forgiveness for the ways that your anger and bitterness have injured your relationship with Him and other people. Ask God to give you the peace and strength you need to move ahead with your life. Pray for the wisdom you need to determine what specific changes you should make with how you spend your time, energy, money, and talents so you’ll be able to fulfill God’s purposes for you.
Accept that the responsibility for getting back on track is yours and no one else’s. Only you can make the decision to get back on track with God; no one else can do it for you. So take stock of where you currently are in life, ask God to give you a vision of where He would like you to be, and develop a plan with specific goals to align every part of your life with God’s plans for you.
Choose to believe what God says about Himself. The Bible reveals that God is good and can be trusted. So recognize that God didn’t cause your abuse; rather, religious leaders who misused their authority are responsible for the abuse you’ve suffered. God cares deeply about what you’ve gone through, and you can count on Him to heal you, so make a determined effort to separate God from the abuse.
Commit to repairing your relationship with God and making amends with everyone you’ve wronged along the way. Confess the sins you’ve committed that have distanced you from God, ask God’s forgiveness for them, and accept the forgiveness He gives you. Then contact each of the people you’ve hurt or offended and apologize to them for what you said and did that was wrong. Try to make amends however you can, such as by repaying a debt or restoring something that was damaged in your relationships. Ask God to help you change your behavior going forward.
Refuse to become like those who have abused you, and abandon your desire to spread malice because of your pain and anger. Stop pursuing vindication and let go of all of your resentment. After purging your soul of toxic emotions, ask the Holy Spirit to fill your soul with love, joy, peace, patience, and kindness.
Write an account of your abusive experiences as well as your subsequent behavior. Take an inventory of what happened to you and how you acted out as a result. Be honest as you record this in writing, and enjoy the freedom you’ll feel when you expose your dark past to God’s light.
Share your experience and your own wrongdoing with a trusted friend. Meet with a friend to discuss your thoughts and feelings about the abuse you’ve suffered and the unhealthy ways you’ve reacted to it. Choose a friend who will accept you just as you are while gently guiding you, encouraging you to heal, and praying for you.
Humbly ask God to change you and help you forgive your abusers. Invite God to change every part of you so you can become the person He intends you to become. Rely on God’s help to forgive the religious leaders who abused you. Remember that God has forgiven you for many sins, and He will bless you with a closer relationship with Him when you obey His command to forgive others as He has forgiven you.
Choose to believe that God still has a good purpose for your life. Trust God’s promises that He has a good purpose and a hopeful future for you. From now on, choose: love over hate, right over wrong, forgiveness over retaliation, reconciliation over alienation, faith over fear, joy over depression, and peace over turmoil.
Nurture your relationship with God, asking Him to reveal His will to you and give you the power to carry it out. Make your relationship with God your top priority, and base all of your decisions on that. Ask God to show you how you can help other people who have gone through religious abuse and act on whatever specific ways God calls you to help others who need to heal.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
The Case against Vanilla
Note: How old are you? Let me guess. . .in your 30s? 40s? 50s? I am not talking about how old you may look, but how old are you in terms of your living? Are you a predicable person fearful of new challenges? Are you closed minded to try something new (not wrong), just different? Are the adventures of life passing you by because you do not want to be bothered out of your routine? Here is an article that ought to put some spark back into your life, especially if you live older than you look. Enjoy!
The Case against Vanilla
Charles R. Swindoll
Text: Genesis 12:1-8; Joshua 14:1-15; Psalm 33:3
I cannot imagine anything more boring and less desirable than being poured into the mold of predictability as I grow older. Few things interest me less than the routine, the norm, the expected, the status quo. Call it the rebel in me, but I simply cannot bear plain vanilla when life offers so many other colorful and stimulating flavors. A fresh run at life by an untried route will get my vote every time—in spite of the risk. Stay open-minded for a moment and I'll try to show you why.
John Gardner once pointed out that, by their mid-thirties, most people have stopped acquiring new skills and new attitudes in any aspect of their lives. Does that jolt you? Stop and think, you who are over thirty. How long has it been since you acquired a new skill? How many brand-new attitudes have you adopted—personal, political, social, spiritual, financial—since you turned thirty?
Let's probe a little deeper. Do you drive to work the same way every morning? Are you compelled to approach a problem the identical way every time? Does a maverick (even wild) idea challenge you or cause you to retreat into the security of your shell? Have you lost that enthusiastic zest for discovery and adventure?
Say, you're older than you thought. You're older than you ought! God has arranged an "abundant life" for you, but it's slipping past. You're fast becoming addicted to the narcotic of predictability . . . and the longer you persist, the greater will be the pain of withdrawal.
Living and learning are linked; so are existing and expiring. Each day delivers a totally new set of circumstances and experiences. The same hours and minutes which capture the wonder of a child may deepen the rut of an adult.
Ever watched a preschooler's approach to life? His constant curiosity and probing inquisitiveness make every day completely fresh and exciting. To him, learning is natural; to the adult, it's a nuisance.
"Well," you rationalize, "I'm just too set. That's the way I am . . . you can't change me." Who can't change you? God? Like Israel of old, this sort of thinking puts limits on the Lord, discounting His power and denying His presence. Settling down to the hum-drum, bland diet of tasteless existence is a sure invitation for slackness and indolence to invade and plague your dwelling.
"So how do I break out?" you ask. "I guess I could row to Hawaii in a four-foot dinghy or schedule a February vacation in Iceland . . . maybe the family could tackle Everest this summer..."
Unnecessary! Life abounds with everyday problems needing transformation into creative projects. Try taking life by the throat and achieve mastery over a few things that have haunted and harassed you long enough. Or—how about a course at a nearby school this year... or a serious study of some subject all on your own. Why not broaden yourself in some new way to the greater glory of God?
Remember our old friend, Caleb? He was eighty-five and still growing when he gripped an uncertain future and put the torch to the bridges behind him. At a time when the ease and comfort of retirement seemed predictable, he fearlessly faced the invincible giants of the mountain. Read Joshua 14 again. There was no dust on that fella. Every new sunrise introduced another reminder that his body and rocking chair weren't made for each other. While his peers were yawning, Caleb was yearning.
Every one of us was poured into a mold... but some are "moldier" than others. If you are determined and work quickly, you can keep the concrete of predictability from setting rock-hard up to your ears. Then again, if the risks and potential dangers of sailing your ship in the vast oceans of uncertainty make you seasick, you'd better anchor yourself near the shallow shore of security. Concrete sinks fast, you know.
The Case against Vanilla
Charles R. Swindoll
Text: Genesis 12:1-8; Joshua 14:1-15; Psalm 33:3
I cannot imagine anything more boring and less desirable than being poured into the mold of predictability as I grow older. Few things interest me less than the routine, the norm, the expected, the status quo. Call it the rebel in me, but I simply cannot bear plain vanilla when life offers so many other colorful and stimulating flavors. A fresh run at life by an untried route will get my vote every time—in spite of the risk. Stay open-minded for a moment and I'll try to show you why.
John Gardner once pointed out that, by their mid-thirties, most people have stopped acquiring new skills and new attitudes in any aspect of their lives. Does that jolt you? Stop and think, you who are over thirty. How long has it been since you acquired a new skill? How many brand-new attitudes have you adopted—personal, political, social, spiritual, financial—since you turned thirty?
Let's probe a little deeper. Do you drive to work the same way every morning? Are you compelled to approach a problem the identical way every time? Does a maverick (even wild) idea challenge you or cause you to retreat into the security of your shell? Have you lost that enthusiastic zest for discovery and adventure?
Say, you're older than you thought. You're older than you ought! God has arranged an "abundant life" for you, but it's slipping past. You're fast becoming addicted to the narcotic of predictability . . . and the longer you persist, the greater will be the pain of withdrawal.
Living and learning are linked; so are existing and expiring. Each day delivers a totally new set of circumstances and experiences. The same hours and minutes which capture the wonder of a child may deepen the rut of an adult.
Ever watched a preschooler's approach to life? His constant curiosity and probing inquisitiveness make every day completely fresh and exciting. To him, learning is natural; to the adult, it's a nuisance.
"Well," you rationalize, "I'm just too set. That's the way I am . . . you can't change me." Who can't change you? God? Like Israel of old, this sort of thinking puts limits on the Lord, discounting His power and denying His presence. Settling down to the hum-drum, bland diet of tasteless existence is a sure invitation for slackness and indolence to invade and plague your dwelling.
"So how do I break out?" you ask. "I guess I could row to Hawaii in a four-foot dinghy or schedule a February vacation in Iceland . . . maybe the family could tackle Everest this summer..."
Unnecessary! Life abounds with everyday problems needing transformation into creative projects. Try taking life by the throat and achieve mastery over a few things that have haunted and harassed you long enough. Or—how about a course at a nearby school this year... or a serious study of some subject all on your own. Why not broaden yourself in some new way to the greater glory of God?
Remember our old friend, Caleb? He was eighty-five and still growing when he gripped an uncertain future and put the torch to the bridges behind him. At a time when the ease and comfort of retirement seemed predictable, he fearlessly faced the invincible giants of the mountain. Read Joshua 14 again. There was no dust on that fella. Every new sunrise introduced another reminder that his body and rocking chair weren't made for each other. While his peers were yawning, Caleb was yearning.
Every one of us was poured into a mold... but some are "moldier" than others. If you are determined and work quickly, you can keep the concrete of predictability from setting rock-hard up to your ears. Then again, if the risks and potential dangers of sailing your ship in the vast oceans of uncertainty make you seasick, you'd better anchor yourself near the shallow shore of security. Concrete sinks fast, you know.
Friday, March 4, 2011
How to Replace Food Cravings with God Cravings
Note: Because we are people who desire immediate gratification, we tend to substitute the eternal for the temporal. Food is the temporal and the Word of God is the eternal. Jesus said this: “Man shall not live by bread (the temporal) alone, but by every Word (the eternal) which proceeds from the mouth of God” – Matt. 4:4. So how then do we come to the place where we can learn to substitute the temporal for the eternal? Read on and enjoy!
How to Replace Food Cravings with God Cravings
Whitney Hopler
After a stressful day, when you're seeking peace, do you spend time with God in prayer? Or do you find a few minutes of comfort with a plate of brownies? When you're dealing with a situation that makes you sad, do you talk with God about how you feel? Or do you open a bag of potato chips to try to numb your sorrow?
God has made you to crave Him - not food. If you rely on food to satisfy you, you may experience temporary satisfaction when you eat, only to be hungry again, following a vicious cycle of cravings and hunger that will never lead to real fulfillment. The food you consume can consume your life that way.
So learn how to fulfill your deepest desires with God rather than food. Here's how:
Ask God to give you the desire to be healthy.
You probably already know a lot about how to eat nutritious foods in ways that will help you enjoy good health. But if you're struggling with food cravings that are causing you to make unhealthy food choices, you need to want to be healthy. So pray for the desire you need to motivate you to pursue better health spiritually, physically, and mentally.
Use your cravings as promptings to pray. Start a habit of responding to each unhealthy food craving you experience with prayer, asking God to help you find satisfaction in healthier choices.
Create a plan to change.
Consider what unhealthy eating habits you currently have, as well as how you need to change in order to eat in truly healthy ways. Meet with your doctor or a nutritionist for advice. Then create a plan that details specific changes you want to make to how you eat. Don't give into any excuses that will hold you back. Keep in mind that, although you'll need to make sacrifices, the point isn't to deny yourself but to embrace healthy choices that will help you enjoy a better life.
Get some friends involved.
Ask at least one of your friends to join you on the quest to eat healthier. Encourage each other and hold each other accountable as you track your progress together.
Embrace your true identity.
Recognize that God made you for much more than being stuck in a vicious cycle of unhealthy eating that leaves you feeling defeated and imprisoned. So embrace your true identity as a person who is loved and meant to be free, confident, and holy. Keep in mind that living in spiritual victory will be sweeter than any food you crave right now.
Live by the Spirit.
Pray regularly for the Holy Spirit to give you the wisdom and self-control to avoid food that isn't beneficial to your health. As you break free of consuming thoughts about food, invite the Holy Spirit to show you your calling in life more clearly and empower you to pursue that calling more confidently.
Fill your mind with biblical truth.
Replace the lies you've believed about food (such as that it can make you happy) and yourself (such as that you're not worth as much if you're overweight than you would be if you were physically fit) with thoughts that reflect biblical truth. Read the Bible often, and memorize verses that help you see yourself and your relationship to food accurately, absorbing them into your soul so they'll be there to encourage you when you encounter the temptation to eat in unhealthy ways.
Make peace with your body.
Even though your body will never be perfect in this fallen world, recognize that it's a good gift from God. Decide to do the best you can to take good care of the body God has given you.
Move your body.
Create a plan to exercise regularly, doing types of exercise that you genuinely enjoy, so you'll be likely to stick with your plan.
Don't compromise.
Ask God to empower you to stick with your healthy eating and exercise plans all the time - even during special times such as vacations and holidays - since one compromise easily leads to another, which leads to failure. But if you consistently make one wise decision after another, you'll enjoy victory.
Call sin what it really is.
Overeating or indulging in too many unhealthy foods is gluttony, which the Bible says is a sin. When you sense that you're harming your body through gluttony, confess that gluttony as sin to God and repent of it, making sure to limit your portions to the right amounts when eating.
Recognize emotional triggers so you can deal them.
Pay attention to the ways in which your emotions are triggering you to eat in unhealthy ways. For example, if you notice that you turn to food for comfort when you feel disappointed or frustrated, use that knowledge to make yourself pause the next time you feel those emotions, and decide to pray about your feelings rather than responding to them by eating.
Let yourself be hungry for holiness.
As you practice the discipline of denying yourself unhealthy food you used to enjoy, your soul will learn more about longing, which will motivate you to crave more of what will ultimately fulfill you - a closer relationship with God. When you're hungry, you can discover how to become more holy. So pray for God to unsettle your soul so you can break free of all the unhealthy habits that have been pulling you away from God. Then enjoy filling your soul the love God will give you when you draw closer to Him.
How to Replace Food Cravings with God Cravings
Whitney Hopler
After a stressful day, when you're seeking peace, do you spend time with God in prayer? Or do you find a few minutes of comfort with a plate of brownies? When you're dealing with a situation that makes you sad, do you talk with God about how you feel? Or do you open a bag of potato chips to try to numb your sorrow?
God has made you to crave Him - not food. If you rely on food to satisfy you, you may experience temporary satisfaction when you eat, only to be hungry again, following a vicious cycle of cravings and hunger that will never lead to real fulfillment. The food you consume can consume your life that way.
So learn how to fulfill your deepest desires with God rather than food. Here's how:
Ask God to give you the desire to be healthy.
You probably already know a lot about how to eat nutritious foods in ways that will help you enjoy good health. But if you're struggling with food cravings that are causing you to make unhealthy food choices, you need to want to be healthy. So pray for the desire you need to motivate you to pursue better health spiritually, physically, and mentally.
Use your cravings as promptings to pray. Start a habit of responding to each unhealthy food craving you experience with prayer, asking God to help you find satisfaction in healthier choices.
Create a plan to change.
Consider what unhealthy eating habits you currently have, as well as how you need to change in order to eat in truly healthy ways. Meet with your doctor or a nutritionist for advice. Then create a plan that details specific changes you want to make to how you eat. Don't give into any excuses that will hold you back. Keep in mind that, although you'll need to make sacrifices, the point isn't to deny yourself but to embrace healthy choices that will help you enjoy a better life.
Get some friends involved.
Ask at least one of your friends to join you on the quest to eat healthier. Encourage each other and hold each other accountable as you track your progress together.
Embrace your true identity.
Recognize that God made you for much more than being stuck in a vicious cycle of unhealthy eating that leaves you feeling defeated and imprisoned. So embrace your true identity as a person who is loved and meant to be free, confident, and holy. Keep in mind that living in spiritual victory will be sweeter than any food you crave right now.
Live by the Spirit.
Pray regularly for the Holy Spirit to give you the wisdom and self-control to avoid food that isn't beneficial to your health. As you break free of consuming thoughts about food, invite the Holy Spirit to show you your calling in life more clearly and empower you to pursue that calling more confidently.
Fill your mind with biblical truth.
Replace the lies you've believed about food (such as that it can make you happy) and yourself (such as that you're not worth as much if you're overweight than you would be if you were physically fit) with thoughts that reflect biblical truth. Read the Bible often, and memorize verses that help you see yourself and your relationship to food accurately, absorbing them into your soul so they'll be there to encourage you when you encounter the temptation to eat in unhealthy ways.
Make peace with your body.
Even though your body will never be perfect in this fallen world, recognize that it's a good gift from God. Decide to do the best you can to take good care of the body God has given you.
Move your body.
Create a plan to exercise regularly, doing types of exercise that you genuinely enjoy, so you'll be likely to stick with your plan.
Don't compromise.
Ask God to empower you to stick with your healthy eating and exercise plans all the time - even during special times such as vacations and holidays - since one compromise easily leads to another, which leads to failure. But if you consistently make one wise decision after another, you'll enjoy victory.
Call sin what it really is.
Overeating or indulging in too many unhealthy foods is gluttony, which the Bible says is a sin. When you sense that you're harming your body through gluttony, confess that gluttony as sin to God and repent of it, making sure to limit your portions to the right amounts when eating.
Recognize emotional triggers so you can deal them.
Pay attention to the ways in which your emotions are triggering you to eat in unhealthy ways. For example, if you notice that you turn to food for comfort when you feel disappointed or frustrated, use that knowledge to make yourself pause the next time you feel those emotions, and decide to pray about your feelings rather than responding to them by eating.
Let yourself be hungry for holiness.
As you practice the discipline of denying yourself unhealthy food you used to enjoy, your soul will learn more about longing, which will motivate you to crave more of what will ultimately fulfill you - a closer relationship with God. When you're hungry, you can discover how to become more holy. So pray for God to unsettle your soul so you can break free of all the unhealthy habits that have been pulling you away from God. Then enjoy filling your soul the love God will give you when you draw closer to Him.
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